I realize I risk being accused of cashing in on the media circus, (although I don't see why I shouldn't, since everyone else has, except, ironically, her own family, who have proven to be rather camera shy, considering their royal status,) but here goes anyway. It may surprise people to find out that I actually have quite a lot in common with Princess Diana, that so called Queen of Hearts who died 16 years and one day ago in a Paris hospital after a deadly car crash. I realize that I am lacking the blond hair and brilliant blue eyes, and I don't have that shy smile quite captured, and I will certainly never be famous, (infamous in my own family, perhaps, but that's about it.) But I do have a few other things in common that make me think we were sisters under the skin.
For starters, the name Sarah means princess. That's good enough for me right there. Forget being queen for the day, I am The Princess of Quite A Lot (thanks Mary Engelbreit) for life.
I don't have palaces, but I do have 1000 square feet of pure charm, complete with arches and everything, to call my own. It's close enough. More than Diana ever had, actually, since she never lived in a building she herself owned.
I don't have much money, but I did eat very well at the state fair yesterday, and I have been well kept in fresh vegetables since everyone I know started harvesting their gardens. I doubt Diana ever ate better, and I know she didn't eat healthier, given her highly publicized bouts with bulimia.
My tiara is... well, okay. I never had a tiara. But I do have some sparkly jewelry from Claire's that I like to wear. It would flash if anyone ever took my picture on a red carpet.
We are both tall. We were both slender at 35. We both had a thing for foreign accents. We both had two kids we adore, and a husband who wasn't exactly... well... husband material. And we both struggled with mental demons which affected our lives.
We were practically twins.
All of which is to say, the princess was not only a tabloid character to titillate us on Sunday morning in the Entertainment section and People magazine each week. I think the part of her which appealed to most people was the sheer reality of her. Certainly that is true for me, anyway.
She was all kinds of real, from her bi-polar behavior to her fun loving trips to amusement parks with her kids. Although the tabloids focused on her event appearances, her charitable causes and her scandalous affairs, I find it interesting that the stories of real people who met her and knew her center on her kindness, her empathy, her ability to reach them at their level. In other words, she was genuine, and her heart was honest with them.
I don't, as a general rule, think celebrities would be very interesting to meet. But I wish I could have met Diana, not in her famous role, but in her private moments. I think we would have found a lot to talk about.
Princess Diana was an icon, and not just for her clothing choices or her famous ring, or even her brilliant smile. She used her fame to advance the often under-represented causes which were near to her heart - AIDS, land mines, children. Her red carpet appearances were opportunities which she unfailingly used to shine the light on issues which she felt needed additional exposure. It is hard to imagine that AIDS patients would have achieved the sort of acceptance they did as quickly without her to hold a hand or hug the dying in their hospital beds. Land mines were simply not discussed before Diana decided they were important.
It is sad that so many years after her death, the focus remains on the last moments of her life, and not on the moments which really mattered to her. I think it is instructive that Diana, for all her fame, craved the stolen moments when she was alone with her causes. No less a person than Mother Teresa, who died at the same time, by the way, considered Diana a real blessing to the causes she uplifted. Say what you like about Diana's excesses, of which there were many, if you have the approval of a Saint like Mother Teresa, you must be doing something right.
Diana was a fragile human being. I think perhaps she was never destined to live a complete life. She is frozen in our memories, much like JFK, as the youthful possibility rather than the old story.
I wonder what the Diana of today would have looked like. I wonder if she would be a happier person, living a private life somewhere, or if she would have continued her life of quiet desperation, flitting from one infatuation to the next, always searching for the elusive happiness which was never within her grasp.
Diana was an ethereal person, one that I feel we never truly knew. She was right to be suspicious of those who would take advantage of her fame or her position to better themselves at her expense. I wonder, though, if she had anyone other than her children at the end who loved her wholly for herself? It makes me sad for her that she so desperately searched for love without ever understanding how much the world loved her precisely for her flaws and her humanity.
When I consider Diana's public persona and compare it with the personal stories of those who knew her, I feel that she was, indeed, a special spirit. We all have our place in this life, and for however long we are here, it is up to us to make the most of it. I think, all in all, Diana did the best she could with the fool's gold that was her life. I don't think we can really ask for more of anyone.
RIP Diana. I hope you have found peace at last in your eternal rest.
